Awoken~

Ai qing bu neng zhou bi jiao~

Wad's lost is lost, all i can do now is to not lose wad i still possess.. A future.. I hope its still there...

I have a lot to think about lately.. wad have i been doing all this week.. hanging out with brothers.. Slacking.. doing nth practically.. wasting my life away.. Its a different life.. and it really opened up my eyes to the pai kia life-style.. I really hate it and dun really enjoy a single moment of it as it doesn't benefits me anything at all.. nth at all.. I jus hope i'm in time to catch the departuring train.. i wanna get out of this whole thing... It really suxs.. Well.. I have no one to blame and no one shall be blamed for wadever that is happening right now.. I have to say i do enjoy the time i spend from Jan '08 all the way till i had another gal in my life.. That period was really the best.. It was all about working, earning money, slacking with frens or colleages after work to drink and nth else.. Well.. i guess that short span of 6mths will be considered one of the best moments in my life.. and i would very much like to go back to that life-style.. Why did the chain have to break? why can't it last longer for awhile more.. =( Because of her presence in my life, things started to change gradually... now i dun blame her cuz its not her fault.. its the control or should i say discipline.. I lost it and once again focus all my time on her and not long.. i joined a company.. Intro-ed by sebas.. Many frens told me I no longer am myself anymore.. =( Sorry dudes.. i'm really sorry.. I jus wanna have a insight on how things are run and stuff.. haix.. after all.. I only understand 1 thing.. if this goes on.. i'm only courting death.. All day long fool ard with brothers, plus my then-gf who doesn't like to study no matter how hard i tried to knock sense into her.. Haix.. Its going down for me.. and now i find myself here.. pathetic..

Anyway.. The song i uploaded really suits me.. okok... for alot others out there as well who have fallen out of love.. Shan't say too much anymore.. Cuz there's nothing else to say le.. Time for me to wake up le.. And i seriously need to wake up..

Time to head out.. dota night.. Cya ppl..




Know why last night i chose not to go down? Not because i'm afraid to face u or wadever.. Its jus no point doing pain to myself seeing u guys doing wadever i know u guys are doing.. Its jus pointless.. Since u came out all the way there to enjoy.. no point appearing in front of u again... Dun wanna mess up ur night.. its better off that way.. For the both of us... I dun wish to have anything to do with ya anymore... Cuz i know you'r not the gal.. Short term happiness won't get u far.. Imagine all the pain u have to go thru again.. not much in my case.. No matter how u end up.. Its all because of you.. Take caree...